Leftover
by
Sheila Lee Brown
Published by Sheila Lee Brown
Smashwords Edition
Copyright 2011 by Sheila Lee Brown
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Leftover
Mattie prayed that day for the third time in her life. That is, really prayed. Her mother had made her pray by her bedside ever since she could remember. But, reciting didn’t count. She was thirty-seven now and just beginning to realize that her views of life weren’t quite the reality. Mattie wanted to make it up somehow. She believed that all those years of prayer by rote really created a couple of marks against her. There couldn’t be many worse things than badgering God with repetition.
The first time Mattie sincerely prayed was when her father had left her and her mother for good. Mattie watched her mom fall limply to the floor, sobbing. Not knowing what else she could do at only eight years old, she had fallen to her knees before her mother and prayed with all her might:
“Dear, God. Daddy’s gone an’ left Mama and me, but we ain’t afraid. Sir, we know that you’re watching over us and that we will be all right as long as we remain good folks. And my mama is real good, tho’ I cheated on my math test yesterday ‘cause I couldn’t remember what 7 times 8 was and I knew Catherine sitting next to me was sure to get it right. But I won’t do that no more, God. I know you’re going to help Mama sit up and take care of me, even if I’m good for nothing like Daddy always said. ‘Cause we’re your children, God, and we need things. I forgive Daddy for leaving us. Please help Mama. He won’t be around to make her feel bad any more, and that makes me glad. Amen.”
Her mom had grown quieter as she spoke. She wasn’t crying any more by the time Mattie had finished praying. They held each other for a while, then her mother seemed to shrug something off, sat up, and looked at her daughter as if seeing her for the first time. She smiled weakly.
“I’m okay, baby.” She hugged Mattie one last time, then stood up. “People are goin’ talk, child, and we goin’ hurt for a while.” She sighed deeply and brushed Mattie’s hair out of her eyes. “But, I think we goin’ be all right.”
And they were just fine. Mattie would sometimes imagine that her dad had been placed under a spell or cursed like a character in the stories she liked to read at night. She didn’t particularly wish for the spell to be broken and for him to return, but it helped Mattie make sense of the situation. Mattie and her mom grew close and all seemed well until Mattie’s junior year of high school when her mother got sick with cancer. Devastated by the potential loss of her mother, Mattie prayed with all her might a second time.
“Dear, God. I know it’s been a while since we really talked. And, it’s not quite right for me to only come to you when something has gone wrong. But…I need my mama. I don’t have anyone else in the world. Please don’t take her just yet. Amen.”
Her mother had lived until after Mattie had graduated from high school. Mattie was sad, but grateful for the time she had with her mom. She felt like God had answered her wish, like the genie in her favorite fairy tales. It made Mattie a little nervous.
With her mother gone, Mattie was alone. She found that her mom had saved quite a bit, and, of course, there was insurance money. Mattie had gone to college and eventually became an assistant librarian at the public library.
She really liked her job. She loved being around all those books and stories, but she had never been able to make friends very easily. She always had a fear that if she got too close to someone they would leave or die. A part of her knew this was irrational, but she couldn’t quite get over it. And now Mattie was regretting her commitment to solitude. She was so very alone and was uncertain about what to do about it. The only person she knew to turn to was God.
So, she prayed for the third time in her life.
“Dear, God. I’m lonely. I need something or someone in my life to take care of. I just know I can’t go on like this and you’re the only one who can help me. I don’t know how you’re going to help me, but I know all things are possible through you. And, you’ve always been there for me. Thank you for loving me so much. Amen.”
Mattie didn’t feel like the prayer was all it should be, but she was sure God would appreciate her brevity. She knew that He knew what was in her heart. She just had to bring it forward.
Mattie felt a sense of peace as she went about her day. She went out for a walk and read her favorite fantasy novel and settled in to have her dinner that evening. Mattie decided to finish up the meatloaf from the previous night. Quite a bit of it had been left and she had wrapped the metal pan in plastic and placed it in the refrigerator. Mattie pulled it out and sat it on the table, thinking with a chuckle how the meatloaf was alone like her, leftover from a previous meal like she was leftover from her family. She smiled as she thought, Guess I’ll just have to find something to go with you! Mattie left the meatloaf as she moved into the kitchen and prepared some fresh mashed potatoes and green beans to go along with it.
As the potatoes were boiling, a movement from the table caught Mattie’s attention and she glanced over at the meatloaf, which had begun to bubble and stretch under the plastic wrap. Mattie’s first instinct was to panic or scream, but the sense of peace she had felt from praying grew stronger and she felt drawn towards the table. She stared down in fascination as the meatloaf began to reshape.
The center of the meat began forming into something familiar. A small hand stretched out and pressed against the plastic wrap. Mattie quickly removed the wrapping and instinctively reached towards the hand, but stopped shy of touching it. A small face had begun to emerge and then a head and torso pulled away from the metal container. Another hand and arm formed. Then, legs and feet.
The texture of the meatloaf slowly faded into an olive skin tone, much like Mattie’s. Mattie watched in amazement and then clasped her hands in delight. It was a small child, a boy. He was little, about the size of Mattie’s hand, and he reminded her of the story of Tom Thumb, only slightly bigger.
“Oh, thank you, God!” Mattie yelled upward, her arms outstretched in joy. “Thank you for answering my prayer so quickly.”
She then took her tiny child in her hands and held him close to her, already feeling an all-encompassing love for him. The little body stretched its limbs lazily. The mouth yawned. And, the eyes opened.