The Beautiful G.A.G.A
German Alcala
Published by German Alcala at Smashwords
Copyright 2011 German Alcala
Dear Reader,
This is the second poetry collection I wrote through the eyes of my persona G.A.G.A, and the first one I publish. There is nothing I could say other than that that the poetry could not say for me. I hope you enjoy the poems, and for anybody who likes it the first book I wrote with G.A.G.A will be out during the summer of 2011, and for the people who don’t like it… you should read the first book when it comes out in hopes of finding something better.
Sincerely,
German Alcala
THE BEAUTIFUL G.A.G.A
POEM LISTING
Intro. The Manifesto of G.A.G.A
.…Introduction….
The Manifesto of G.A.G.A
This is the manifesto of the G.A’s
In the mind of a slowly deranged poet
G.A.G.A was born
German Alcala, a talented yet fragile being
He lived within the body of another
German Alcala, a beauty of night and crime
But the two minds were not two beings
They were slowly coming together as one
As the Notorious Criminal shot farther out
The Fragile Talent quietly lurked back away
And the criminal became fragile from inside
It was then clear that they would prosper
And thus began the power of two beings
Arms of strong evil wrapped around the delicate talent
As they flew high into the night sky in one body
They bore ambition, pure power, and boundless talent
However, as they flew higher into the dark
They found the source of all the darkness there
It was the hands of reason holding down the two beings
The darkness seeped into the one body’s mind
And it cried out in anger as the two beings separated
As the madness overcame the terrible darkness
A glint of light in the shadows appeared to help them
The two beings now safe only feared of higher darkness
“How would we stay the same with coming shadows?”
How indeed? These are their stories of pain and redemption.
.…1….
The Beautiful G.A.G.A
Out of the fascinating darkness I dance
You may not touch me, but merely glance
Watch my hips shake from side to side
As my long slender legs take me on a ride
Like a doll with a dark sensuality and deathliness
Drink in my allure while I sing out of my sadness
The Beautiful G.A.G.A to serve only you.
All of life and of death have left me blue
Happiness abandoned me for half a year
It left me to whimper in fear and to tear
The Beautiful G.A.G.A at your service, dear!
One summer’s day I met somebody without fear
He took my hand and led me into light with love
Slowly I began to once again believe in God above!
The Beautiful G.A.G.A what rhymes do you embrace?
How beautiful the ability to drip out words in grace
The words that comfort me in any darkness or cold
With ink that can warm my young sweet heart of gold.
Dancing through the dark with my impressionable ways
I begin to forget any days made out of shades of grays
See for me and this boy love each other’s bright eyes
I am The Beautiful G.A.G.A, and my heart is his
His light and love tried in vain to heal bitterness
On nights that I am alone and my mind roams
I begin to sob once more in my quiet stifled groans
Yet I am the Notorious G.A.G.A
Still I am the Beautiful G.A.G.A
I dance through the night’s darkness
My beautiful body fueled by sadness
The Beautiful G.A.G.A at your service and the world’s
What beautiful dignity in the ability to control my words
That beautiful shining ink that can help to cover any pain
Its dark love will live inside and on me in love or insane
Watch me, and hear me when I cry into the night with joy
It is false, but you know that I cry with a passion I deploy
Admire my body for everything that it’s worth to the world
The Beautiful G.A.G.A made of grace and of no other word
The Beautiful G.A.G.A at you service, at his, and at theirs
When the moon falls dance away with me as I end my flares!
….2….
Earn Every Tear
Madre, mi madre, yo te quiero
Un poco
Unos años son todo que ocupo
Para que te pare de querer tanto
Mother, my mother, I love you
A bit
Some years are just what I need
To stop loving you so much
Earn every tear that you pull out of me
Every sob and tear that you spill is hidden
Can’t you see? I’m already dead. So, see!
You do not help me in my depression
You blind witch
You have allowed me to lose my dignity
You have allowed me to lose my sanity
My heart is dust and made of bitterness
Steal the happiness that you once conjured
Then earn every tear you make me spill
Do not cry for you have lost nothing
You took it from yourself
Pray for your soul and mine
We have committed sins
Earn every tear that you pull out of me
Every spasm and gasp is a secret from you
When will you see? I did nothing wrong
Not until you decided I hated you first
You blind woman
You told me to lose all of my dignity
You told me I had already lost my sanity
You said that you would not have had me
If you knew how negative I am to the world
That is how you earn the tears
When will you see?
Don’t be so blind
Why don’t you see?
I won’t hide
You know how to steal my happiness
You know how to feed me bitterness
You recognize that I am purely venomous
Because I come from the loins of evil
You do not yet realize your hard work
Realize that I really do listen
You earn every tear from me
Entérate que yo si escucho
Te ganas cada lágrima de mí
….3….
Kiss Me, Sky
This day
I was depressed
But sadness is just a plague
Why bother with sadness?
I am happy to be glad
So glad I think I can fly
There are no limits now
Kiss me, sky
I want to reach the clouds
And jump off of them
And touch the sun
Please kiss me, sky
Make love to me
I’m in love with the sky
I won’t cry today for the rest of the day
Monsters and bitches of horrible manners
Who don’t respect me or want me
They’re not what I am concerned with tonight
Heaven forgive me for this
Oh, body please don’t punish me in the morning
But I needed to escape the ground below
I needed the relief
And now I’m flying
I am in love with the feeling of weightlessness
And I am obsessed with the power in the warmth
The sun wraps itself around me
And the sky kisses me
Oh kiss me, sky
The sun wraps around my weak being
And the sky is kissing me
It feels like I could be a king
A crown might as well be on my head
Oh, sky, kiss me deeper
The liquid rushing through my throat
The warmth deep in my bones
The sizzling inside my head
It’s all worth it just for this affair
Kiss me, Sky, kiss me so deeply
Burn my mind and warm my bones
Fill my heart with fire
And blind me after a thousand shots
My loving sky, how I love you
Kiss me deeply
Let me forget
Everything
Kiss me, Sky, I want your lips
Kiss me, Sky, I want your tongue
Kiss me, Sky, just kiss me now
I’ll shut my mouth
Kiss me, Sky
….4….
Those Guns
Put down those paws, and calm your growling faces
Stick out two fingers and journey into dark new places
Let the tambourines ban the presence of bright suns
It’s time for the people to pull out their guns
Look at my beautiful gun filled with the chemical
Of my own beautiful, shiny, smooth, and soft metal
Don’t pull the trigger on that baby just yet, my love
If you pull the trigger the wrong way you’ll go above
Don’t be afraid of the gang gathering outside on the lawn
They’re here in peace to have a shoot out until the dawn
Tell me that you’re hard and pull out those guns
Give me the pleasure of touching those magnificent guns
Only I seem to know how to use a whip and a gun at once
Pull the trigger smoothly and shoot high up with that gun
Don’t let me down when you brandish that powerful gun
Reload and rest for only a moment before you shoot again!
And let the sound of shooting drive the neighbors insane
Until they decide to join us on our rampage of guns and games
We shout out to South Central, Harlem, and Queens
Pull out those guns and hear those screams
That will be heard from Chicago to the Netherlands
Don’t kill any bitches, and shoot another round of your bullets
Don’t kill any bastards, and make sure the clouds get hits
Shoot those guns, my darling, I want to see those guns
Tonight we need to destroy our eardrums with sounds
Blast those guns and make a show, because I love those guns
Stick out two fingers and chant with the sound of your guns
I have a box of bullets waiting for the crowds of criminals
God above knows that this is one of those nights of miracles
Those guns are out in the air waiting for somebody to scream
Only I know how to shoot the guns filled of strong lead cream
You all know how much I love seeing those beautiful guns
So, put your growls to rest, and lower your manicured paws
Reload your babies, and chant as you throw those guns up
The police are scared to approach the street with the sounds
Scared that the last thing they will hear are our sweet guns
“Follow suit” chant to The Jungles, Jamaica, and Long Beach
“Pull out those guns of peace” plead of the Middle East.
Stick out two fingers and chant with us all night with those guns
Forget to growl in anger and shoot into the night with those guns
Reload those guns, my darling; I want to feel those guns
Let the air vibrate with the power of the bullets in those guns
The lead is making the winds become black with that smell
Blood could be mistaken for the taste in the air of metal
Pull out that extreme alcohol and let the drag queens sing
Take a shot of vodka every time your ears begin to ring
And shut your mouth as I manipulate those beautiful guns
I think the creativity is done now just whip out those guns
From Coast to Coast pull out all of those guns
Keep shooting before we’re silenced by the suns
I want everybody to have their gun in hand
I want the shooting to vibrate throughout the land
Pull out those beautiful metal guns of power
Keep shooting with those bullets that don’t glower
Don’t stop shooting; don’t start bleeding with those guns
Just keep blasting and pounding the wind with those guns
It’s time for the people to pull out their guns
Let the tambourines ban the presence of bright suns
Stick out two fingers and journey into dark new places
Put down those paws, and calm your growling faces
….5….
One of Those Sweet Nights
Standing high in the darkness as wind soothes me from head to toe
I do not bother to keep my head upright as it is pulled by my hair’s flow
This is one of those sweet dark nights filled with memories of pain
My mind reminds me of all I’ve lost and all that I once stood to gain
My hand can feel the phantom of a great love that was once so strong
Heaven forbid that for once in my life I should happen to not be wrong
Allow all the secrets to wash through my being as cold as the wind so thinned
And may love not be able to blind me just like the darkness inside the wind
Happiness has been dangled in front of my face too many times already
And the longer I stand here in the darkness waiting for him to come timely
I become bitterer every time a car passes by and the light is not from him
Now I don’t care if he bothers or not. I already know how to live in the grim
I am almost about to have a new piece of my heart, because I have given it away
It was open to somebody before and it was mutilated and left to rot in a ballet
I remember that other boy. Heaven forbid that my nights should be filled with light
Night was made for darkness, it was made for tears, and it was made for people’s fright
But do not mistake me because I continue to hold no fright for the darkness
Because I have begun to grow so fond of the darkness like a deathly heartless goddess
Don’t be afraid to tease my heart. Don’t feel regret after breaking my heart
I can no longer be taken apart. Have you ever seen a fool try to tear the dark apart?
I am as indestructible as the sorrow that plagues the world without hesitation or mercy
Love and happiness no longer hold any power, and no longer have an influence over me
This is one of those sweet dark nights of beautiful cold and loneliness
Let the bitterness come back into my heart poisoned with some happiness
One of the nights where I fill with the pleasure of being abandoned once more
May the God forgive me for being disillusioned into having something to adore
Dear God, make it so I never have any method of erasing from my mind sadness
I pray now on this sweet dark night to never lose my hatred or my pure bitterness
This is one of those sweet nights that have my mind writhing helplessly in pain
This is one of those sweet nights on which I know there is nothing for me to gain
One of those sweet nights on which I doubt and find everything about me inadequate
This is one of those sweet night on which I learn once more that I am made of hatred
Standing high in the darkness as wind soothes me from head to toe
I do not bother to keep my head upright as it is pulled by my hair’s flow
….6….
Seems I Slip His Mind
It’s been a long night, and I stood by my window the whole time just waiting quietly.
Hoping to see him come by every time I counted to five
And now I ask it of God “Please forgive me for having waited on a boy…
Forgive me for being so blind and silly as to wait on a boy for so long”
I’ve been waiting all night and all day to see him
When I first sat down to wait the sun was bright
But now it’s dark, and the sun has gone past dim
Now I’ll hope he has a reason to make this right
Because it seems I’ve slipped his mind
I don’t know if I should cry tonight as I sleep
Because I’m sure he has better things to do
Than to nourish the heart in which he lies deep
I’m sure he has better people to be around too
He’s forgetting tonight to give me the little love I require
Because I really love him more than I can bare to admit
He used to give me more attention than one should desire
Now there is an idea that it was fickle and had to submit
I wonder if I slipped his mind or if he decided to leave me
It seems I slipped his mind, but I don’t dare to call him up
I’m afraid to hear him say he didn’t feel like seeing me
Despite the fact that he once told me he’d love me enough
Seems I slip his mind when he has better things to do
But I only require a little bit of love to be at my best
It seems I slip his mind when he has better people too
I hope he comes back with a reason to put this to rest
Because it seems I slipped his mind
Because he’s in my heart after so much time
And I don’t want to slip his mind
Because I love him despite the lonely time
And I hope I didn’t slip his mind
Because for tonight
For this night so cold
It seems I slipped his mind
It seems I slipped his mind.
….7….
The Biggest Kiss
He has a face that is nothing short of intoxicatingly ethereal (I want to kiss him)
His body, his words, his heart, and that with no name are all beautiful
Let me think of a day on which we will kiss next. Gather, my muses, sing with me.
Let us imagine a day on which we will be in true love. We will be so free.
For such a long time I have been frozen by fear and by angry depression.
That other hurtful boy has finally lost me, and my young heart was in decomposition
My prince charming doesn’t seem to care. He rode in with his horses on time
Let the hurtful boy lose me, and may we celebrate with this rhyme
My beautiful muses sing for me, declare to the winds what my heart cannot
“I want to pull him close and give the biggest kiss that my lips can possibly bear
And while I kiss him let us close our eyes and wander mentally if we so dare”
Can you feel my wet mouth? Swallowing your mind, and taking you far away
In another dimension I am holding your hand, and we are running into the day
In the stars of the sky. Can you see what I see? We are dancing in the wind
My loving prince, we are floating with our love looking down upon all mankind
In the air you swoon in my arms, and our hair is tossed, but our lips do not part
Can you feel the fire that is growing with a passion inside of my once dead heart?
My beautiful muses, not as beautiful as him, ring us away from the sky
“The precious dance in the sky must come to an end, but don’t cry
You see this is a kiss that does not break easily. This is the biggest kiss.
The biggest kiss that can be given, and throws you into mind blowing bliss”
It is your turn, my love, to place your hands to hold me closer on my hips
Close our eyes, shake me to my core, and allow your tongue to invade my soft lips
Can you feel the water running? I can surely feel your arms around me
In the vastest ocean of our small universe you are holding me lovingly
Our eyes locked in a loving embrace, and the creatures of the blue in hunger
Will I let them eat you? First dead. Swimming with you I feel much stronger
Keep your eyes closed, my love. Press your body against mine. Tell me where next…
“In the biggest kiss things like space and time do not matter. Nothing is much too complex
Two lovers who love with their hearts and minds could cross through hell
So, kiss me deeply with a passion so powerful and heart stunning that I cannot tell”
Bite my bottom lip, and let me run my fingers through your beautiful hair
Close your eyes and imagine the day that we can live together as a loving pair
May our power wash away, may the money blow in air, and may our home burn
You can hold me in water, Aquarius, but in fire I am the Earth, so, my turn.
Can you feel my arms wrap around you in the suffocation of the dark lethal smoke?
Darling, let me tell you that not in a million years will I let you be the one to choke
I would rather burn the soles of my feet while trying to get you out of flames
Than let you be the one to sacrifice yourself; you’re too precious for games
Let me lose my tongue in your mouth and make you breathe softly in pleasure
“In the biggest kiss the world can stop turning while the lover adores his treasure.
In the biggest kiss do not mistake absolute pleasure for absolute heaven. It’s strong.
It may feel like a thousand years could pass by with our lips together. You would not be wrong.”
Let me brush my legs up against yours with a growing need to rub against you
Don’t worry; I will not allow my legs to go too far. They would fall into the blue
For at the same time that we are running on a beautiful green hillside we are still
In the paradox that our love can create you take a trip and down the hill you tumble
I laugh as you roll along the grass, and when you come to stop you do not move
In sudden horror I run up to you. You laugh at my terrified face, but I approve
I bend down to kiss your lips as I help you to your feet, my love, do not fall again
Should something happen to you this time I wouldn’t know how to claw out of pain
My muses, don’t you dare say it… I love him too much, please, don’t do it
“In the biggest kiss all good things must come to an end before it becomes difficult
Overcome the chemistry to let your lips lose their fondness, and then… let go”
That beautiful boy with the softest lips I have ever seen, and the sweetest heart
Has intoxicated my mind and is quickly making my mind begin to fall apart
I want him to be a million things, and I want him to be a million miles closer
I feel so desperate and so clingy by saying all these words of love like a pusher
But I can’t help myself. I blame my heart, my blood, and my fingers for this
He might never understand just how badly I want to give him the biggest kiss
You my beautiful boy, I want to give you the biggest deepest kiss I can give
I want give you everything that I have and more just to say I that I can give
I want to fill your mouth with flames, and undo your mind with the pleasure
I want you to know how much of a precious love you are, my golden treasure
My heart is fluttering just from looking and knowing somebody so beautiful (I want to be his)
He has a face that is nothing short of intoxicatingly ethereal (I want to kiss him)
….8….
My Dead Bitch
Running on the cold pavement at the darkest hour of night
With my companions German Alcala the fragile poet in fright
And the drag queen Hermana Alacran with her dress so bright
The hour is past three and the woman who killed my friend
Is inside that house and I have no more patience to spend
I was the first one inside, and as I shot I followed trend
I don’t know even in my all knowing state how she knew
But the moment I walked through the door her gun blew
I shot a bullet into her heart, but I was already shot too
The drag queen and poet ran in after me with their guns up
They found me on my back realizing I was not fast enough
They both fell to their knees at my side not giving up
The last I heard in my mortal life was the voice of loyalty
As my followers ran out outside the house and around me
As they sang helplessly to the night in one resounding plea
“My dead bitch, stop bleeding. You are not the one to die
My dead bitch, start breathing. I know that you cannot lie
My dead bitch, stop exaggerating. You know you have to try
My dead bitch, keep defeating. What happened to the guns?
My dead bitch, start beating. You still have a thousand suns
My dead bitch, stop fleeting. You haven’t led all of your sons.
I remember when you threw your heart into the wind
And declared every way in which you have previously sinned
I declare you unable to die, because you cannot be thinned
You shot a bullet into the air knowing where it would land
You cannot be gone yet, because you still despise the sand
Dear woman, you were still becoming somebody too grand
The world and the sun all centered on you for a quick blast
But goodness knows that that moment was not your last
If you leave now then your end will have been much too fast
My dead bitch, don’t die on me. Your heart must not stop
My dead bitch, there’s more to see. Don’t you dare drop
My dead bitch, don’t leave me. You were almost on top
My dead bitch, why would stop? Start breathing again
My dead bitch, don’t you dare drop. I remember then
My dead bitch, get up from that spot. Don’t refrain”
They fell to their knees on the cold pavement
Not wanting to believe the newest incident
As they sang out in pain from the new permanent
The bitch was now dead, and still breathe taking
“My dead bitch, please stop and tell me you’re faking”
In death I no longer have to feel my heart breaking
Fin
Thank you for reading. Come Again.
Author Info:
German Alcala:
From Los Angeles, California German Alcala is 14 years old, Mexican, Gay, and considers himself a novelist, poet, singer, dancer, carpenter, and everything in between! German Alcala's biggest inspirations include Edgar Allan Poe, Maya Angelou, and Jackie Collins. He is the Editor In Chief, and owner of a new online literary magazine THE INKBLOT, has self-published eBooks across the web from Apple iBooks to Barnes and Noble NookBooks, has been called Awesome, Inspiring, and Amazing in book reviews.
Discover other titles by German Alcala at Smashwords.com:
Gay Enough - http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/24089
Gay Enough 2 - http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/55292
Swing: A Psychopathy - http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/55995
Connect with Me Online:
Website: GermanAlcala.TK
Twitter: http://twitter.com/GermanAlcal
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000040279504
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/GermanAlcalaSahagun