Killer Temptations
Danity O’Shae
***
Killer Temptations
Danity O’Shae
Copyright © 2011 Danity O’Shae
All rights reserved.
Smashwords Edition
***
Prologue
“Something positive…?” I mused out loud as I held the small hand mirror close, my reflection blinking back at me from under the unruly mass of curls that framed my narrow face.
My skin warmed as the lit candle burned lower, my chin hovering dangerously close to the flame. An eerie glow flickered in ghostly waves over the face in the mirror, the sad expression all to familiar as I struggled to keep my promise to myself. There was nothing positive about my day that I could think of and nothing positive that I could tell myself to make me feel any better.
Sad brown eyes stared back at me, as if to say: “Give up already!” I thought every day about heeding the plea that hid somewhere deep in my soul, but I couldn’t. There was only one thing in my life that was worth living for and I wasn’t about to give up on it. Not ever…
I sighed softly as I studied the smattering of light brown freckles that had graced my nose since birth. Barely visible from an arms length away, they were still my curse to live with and I hated that they made me look so young and naïve. My growling stomach reminded me that I could almost pass for a homeless young teenager, desperately in need of a warm meal and an even warmer bath.
“Tomorrow is a new day,” I murmured as I slid the mirror under my pillow.
Tomorrow… I would find something positive to say about myself.
***
Chapter 1
“Shut up!” I groaned again, this time rolling over as I pulled the comforter even further over my head, tucking it around my face so that the shrill beeping from the alarm was partially blocked out.
Every morning for the last few months had started out like this: me not getting enough sleep the night before, worrying about bills into the wee hours of the morning, until finally drifting off to the sound of gentle snoring coming from the pillow that was always tucked just under my arm. There was no ignoring the insistent beeping any longer, and if I didn’t get up now, I would be late once again for the 9-5 that I didn’t want, but needed desperately. $10.50 an hour, eight hours a day, five days a week was barely keeping the rent paid, and my search for a free babysitter was the same as it had been two months before when I’d decided to get a second job –nonexistent-.
There was no stopping the disdain that crept through me as I reached for the half broken flip phone that vibrated in protest across the nightstand as the internal alarm continued to shriek it’s announcement of the ungodly hour. My fingers reach instinctively for the switch on the rusted brass lamp I knew was there, turning once before remembrance took hold, furthering the chill that now crept across my skin from the cold in the room. We hadn’t had power for weeks, and even though I knew that payday was today, no relief came as my mind picked up where it had left off adding up the bills I could and couldn’t pay with this paycheck.
“Stop it Rae!” I whispered harshly to myself as tears threatened to spill, my fingers now reaching blindly for the tiny 99 cent Bic lighter I’d left beside the half burnt out candles the night before.
This was nothing new. The power had been turned off four times over the last year since Eric had left his son and me without so much as a note to say why. I’d outgrown crying over my problems and had instead dealt with them, using a few dollars here and there to stock up on candles that I knew I would need for the inevitable. What I didn’t spend on candles went to non-perishable items that could be easily warmed up on the battery-operated hot plate I’d found at a thrift shop. There was just not enough money to go around. Even living in a tiny studio apartment, my kitchen and fold up dining room table almost at the foot of my bed, the five hundred dollars in rent, plus utility bills were overwhelming.
“It’s going to be okay,” I reminded myself, shaking off the cold that threatened to set my teeth chattering as I slid my feet from under the warm covers, letting them brush the ice cold floor.
I glanced briefly behind me before shifting slowly from the bed, my hands already reaching for the tattered terry cloth robe I’d thrown across the bed the night before for a little extra warmth. Guilt settled threw me as my eyes fell on my son’s relaxed face, still deep in sleep despite the wintry air that claimed our tiny apartment. Christmas was in two weeks and I had one more paycheck coming before then. I wouldn’t be able to afford a tree or any lavish gifts for him, but he would get something, even if I had to take it out of the rent money.
Sighing softly, I moved around the bed feeling for the wall as I walked, knowing that the bathroom door lay exactly twenty-three steps from the left corner of mattress. The sink groaned in protest but finally came to life, the rusty pipes creaking against the freezing water that shot from the leaky faucet. No electric, meant no heat pump, but at least that didn’t affect the water the city pumped through the raggedy building on its own system. When Eric and I had found this place four years ago we’d been in love and oblivious to the fact that the Carver Housing Projects was no place to raise a family.
“Just until he starts school. By that time, we’ll be on our feet and we’re moving upstate. To a house!” Is what he’d told me.
I’d gone to sleep every night after we’d moved in, with him rubbing my swollen pregnant belly, whispering countless promises of our future together. Every promise, every fantasy…I’d believed it all. He’d saved me from the girls home I’d grown up in from birth, helping me run away the day I’d turned eighteen. They never knew I was pregnant and they never came looking for me. With his help I’d gotten my drivers license and even gotten a job as a mail clerk in downtown Manhattan. The insurance company I worked for was nothing to brag about, their business almost going under more than once in the last few years.
I’d started out making twelve dollars an hour and had just recently taken a pay cut in exchange for keeping my job. Everyday I feared I would walk in and they would announce that the company had finally filed for bankruptcy and my services were no longer needed. There were only two of us left in the mail room, me and the guy that had hired me, and the only reason why I’d been spared is because I’d let him fuck me the day after they announced that only two out of the ten people working down there, would be kept.
The secret had eaten me up alive, but at the time, Erickson Jr. was only two years old and Eric had been laid off from his factory job at the Pepsi Cola bottling plant for months. We were barely making ends meet then, and if I’d lost my job too, we would have been homeless. I’d told myself then that it was for the good of my family, but everyday that I walked into work with my bosses lust filled eyes on my butt, I knew it had been the biggest mistake of my life. None of that mattered now.
Erickson Jr. had just turned four years old last Saturday and we hadn’t heard from his father since he was two and a half. I’d tried to not let the arguing between us get to me, knowing that his anger stemmed from the fact that I was working while he remained home with the baby. To me it didn’t matter who brought in the money as long as it came in. To him, he wasn’t a man unless he was taking care of his family.
He’d suddenly changed three months before he left. He no longer argued with me when I walked in the door. In fact he was no longer there at all. The second I walked in, he walked out, mumbling something about job-hunting before slamming the door behind him. I’d spent those three months searching his pockets and every crevice of our tiny apartment looking for clues of another woman, but I never found anything.
The morning he’d left I didn’t think anything of him not being home when I woke up, rushing off to work, mad because I’d had to leave Erickson next door with our neighbor, Ms. Nancy. She was the sweetest old woman, and she was what I would have wanted my own grandmother to be like if I’d had one, but at the time she charged ten dollars a day to watch Erickson, and it was ten dollars that we didn’t have.
I’d spent the day at the office fuming mad, and ready to curse him out the second I’d arrived home, but I never had the chance. Tired and angry I’d charged through the door only to find that the apartment was the same way I’d left it that morning –empty-. What I hadn’t noticed before was that his work boots and his only other pair of shoes were gone from the foot of the bed.
Hope had sprung through me as I looked towards the corner for the small duffel that he used to carry with him to the factory. It was gone, and my heart leapt at the fact that he might have possibly found a job. My silly dance was halted mid jump when my eyes fell on the tiny space in our make shift closet that was now empty of all his clothes. The single rack only held my black dress I reserved for the occasional trip to church and a couple of collar work shirts that I’d gotten at the good will for three dollars a piece. A quick search through the apartment confirmed that he’d left me without so much as a note; his toothbrush and the toothpaste we all shared were even missing.
Ms. Nancy had been the one I’d clung to during the first six months, telling myself that he would come back for us any day now. She had also been the one to make me see that it was just Erickson and me now. I had a child to take care of, and whether or not Eric ever returned, I could no longer cling to the empty promises he’d told me fro all those years. It was just my son and me now.
The reality of that still hurt to this day, but I forced the old memories away, quickly slipping into the work clothes I’d pulled out for myself the night before. There was no time to do anything to the unruly mass of hair that spilled every which way over my shoulders, tangled at the ends from my fitful sleep. I had no one to impress anyway, so I let it hang, making a mental note to myself to grab a rubber band for it when I made it to the office.
The bag that I’d packed for Erickson the night before was just where I’d left it by the door, and I grabbed it easily on my way out, my still sleeping son thrown over my shoulder. A few more minutes and I would be late for the subway that came at exactly 6:27 every morning. If I missed that one, the next one wasn’t until 6:47 and that always made me late for work. It took fifteen minutes to walk from the station to the building I worked in, and there was no way I was giving my boss a reason to call me into his office again. I’d narrowly escaped last time with my shirt still buttoned.
***
Chapter 2
“You know what time it is chile! You’re going to be late again,” Ms. Nancy’s voice called to me from her kitchen, the smell of bacon and homemade pancakes reaching me before I’d shut the door behind me.
“I’m not going to be late. I have…” I paused as I let Erickson fall gently from my arms onto the worn love seat she reserved just for him. “Five minutes!” I exclaimed, dropping his bag on the floor as I bent to kiss his forehead quickly.
“You know you can sleep here, I don’t see why you insist on staying in that cold apartment. No lights, No…”
“Ms. Nancy, please not this morning. I’ve got to go,” I shook my head apologetically for interrupting her chastising at my refusal to stay with her until I got on my feet again.
She was already keeping Erickson for me for only five dollars a day now, and we’d been eating dinner at her house every night for the last four months. There was no way I was going to take any more charity from her. Her two grown sons were more than I could handle, stopping by any time they pleased, and constantly hitting on me, even though they were at least ten or fifteen years older than I was. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that the money that they left for her every week was drug money, earned from selling coke to the scores of teenagers and thugs that littered the outside of the apartment building day and night.
That money is what paid her rent and kept food in all of our bellies. Though she preached religiously against ill-gotten gains, it was better for her not to know what the whole apartment complex had known for years. Her sons were working for Poppa D, and once in, they were in it for life.
“Love ya!” I threw over my shoulder as I hurried for the door, my belly rumbling in protest as I closed it on the delicious smell of breakfast food.
“Wait!” I heard Ms. Nancy call as I skipped over the bottom step, ready to break into a quick jog for the subway station.
“Thanks!” I smiled up at her and waved as I caught the folded brown bag she’d thrown down to me.
There was no way I was refusing what I knew was lunch and probably breakfast too. If she didn’t offer, I didn’t ask, but she offered almost every day, and I never refused. I tucked the still warm bag in my cloth purse as I sprinted now, the subway station in site as I rounded the corner with only a minute to spare.
“I’m sorry!” I called apologetically as I bumped into a girl, who I knew to be one of the neighborhood prostitutes coming out of the dimly lit stairwell.
I ignored the insulted look she tossed my way as she flipped her plastic press on nails in my direction, a string of curse words coming from her mouth as I disappeared from her view.
“No!” I cried, half jumping over the rusty turnstile, my easy pay card beeping as it smacked against the ticket display.
“Come on!” a young man waved at me from inside the train, smiling as I grabbed for his hand, letting him jerk me threw the closing doors.
“Late?” He asked as I pulled the bottom of my coat free from the pressure sealed door, almost falling into him as I steadied myself against the jolt of the train.
“Hakeem,” He offered his name with a smile, a Jamaican accent evident as he started telling me about running late himself this morning.
I’d seen him on the train before, but I was pretty sure this was the first time he’d actually spoken to me.
This was New York. No one spoke to anyone on the subway, and that’s how I liked it. I usually picked a seat in the corner and kept my eyes down until my stop came up.
“I’m sorry,” I said, backing away from him just as he asked for my number. “You’re a little young for me, and I have work to do before I get to the office,” I lied, holding up the empty manila folder I kept in my bag just for this purpose.
It was crumpled from being in there for so long, but he didn’t know it was empty. I watched as he nodded towards me, a smile still frozen on his lips as I turned and went to my favorite corner seat, my back now cocked to him. I could see from the corner of my eye that I’d embarrassed him in front of the other passengers on the train, his head hung low as he moved towards the opposite end of the aisle to take a seat. I wasn’t dating, and he was way too young for me. He didn’t look any older than seventeen or eighteen, and even if I was looking, he wasn’t even my type.
I pretended to study the inside of the manila folder as the train made its usual two stops before mine, passengers entering and exiting at each one. His eyes remained on me for the entire trip, but he made no move to follow as I finally stood at the announcement of my stop. I wasted no time exiting the train and hurrying the remaining three blocks to my building. With ten minutes to spare, I was probably the first one in, and I had time to eat my breakfast in peace before heading to the safety of the sorting room.
Everything was just as I’d left it the day before, the carefully sorted piles, stacked according to department. I handled all the outgoing mail and my boss handled all the incoming mail, leaving both of us up to our necks with work, day in and day out. There were now only two people mulling through what had easily taken ten people to accomplish in a days time. Lower level employees were often understanding, coming down to the mailroom once or twice a day to collect or deposit any mail we hadn’t had a chance to get to. The higher ups were a different story, and they didn’t care if we worked ourselves to death, they still expected everything on their desk within minutes of arriving.
I let my eyes scan over the half lit mailroom, making sure it was empty before settling down at my rickety desk in the corner. There was no reason for me to have a desk really. The only computer down here was in my boss’s office and was used for labeling of outgoing mail. The only use I had for the pitiful workspace was to store my coat and purse out of the way, while I worked.
“Food!’ I moaned quietly to myself as I pulled the contents from the brown bag Ms. Nancy had given me.
I smiled at the carefully cut bacon egg and cheese sandwich, the bread toasted lightly, just how I liked it. Also in the bag was what smelled like chicken salad in a tiny Tupperware container, along with a roll of crackers and two apples. The only thing missing was a drink, and she’d even thought of that I realized as two shiny quarters rolled from the bottom of the bag, settling on the desk with a clink.
“Breakfast?” a voice asked from across the room, near the entrance, his frame suddenly flooded in bright fluorescent light as he flipped all five switches on the wall.
Dread immediately settled through me, as it had every day for the last two years. I couldn’t yet clearly see his expression from across the room, but I cringed as the memory of him moaning on top of me flashed through my head. No matter how hard I tried, there was no way of getting the image of his flushed, pasty white face, contorting in what appeared to be agony as he came all over my stomach that day. It replayed over and over in my head daily, and every time it did, vomit rose from my belly in heaving waves, threatening to spill at any moment.
“I’ll save it for lunch,” I halfway mumbled, shoving the food back into the now crumpled brown bag.
“We have a few minutes, go ahead and eat,” My boss grinned slowly, his eyes already settling on my fully covered breast as I stood to meet his approach.
My stomach practically heaved as his tongue left his mouth for an instant, wetting his chapped lips as he let his eyes roam further down, to my thighs.
“It’s fine…really. We have a lot to get done. I’ll just put this in the fridge and get started,” I replied, not looking at him as I moved to step around where he stood.
“Not so fast,” He murmured, his hand catching my waist just as I started to past him.
“Todd,” My voice was firm, but my skin already crawled from the warmth I felt from his hand through my thin turtleneck.
“I was just going to say you look nice today. Very nice,” He added with a smirk as I smacked his hand away, a blush flooding my cheeks as I hurried across the main area to the sorting room in the back.
I could feel him watching me as I went, his eyes probably on my ass as I slipped through the door, closing it behind me.
I didn’t know how much more of this I could take. There was no complaining. Human Resources had been outsourced long ago, and the big bosses could care less that I was being sexually harassed on a daily basis. Even if I were to report my boss to someone, he would surely bring up the fifteen-second fuck I’d let him have in his office that one day. Either way, I came out looking like a slut who’d asked for it. The only way it would stop is if I found another job, and I knew that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. Working full time, taking care of Erickson Jr. by myself at night, and braiding hair occasionally was all I had time for right now.
Maybe in a few weeks, once the electric was back on, and Christmas was over with, I could take a day off and go job hunting like I’d planned so many times before. I had almost four years under my belt with this company, and even though I didn’t have a college degree I was sure I could find something with a little higher pay if I looked hard enough. A better job would mean a little more money coming in for me and Erickson, and more bills being paid relatively on time. It wouldn’t get us out of the projects, but it would give me some breathing room until I figured something else out.
***
Chapter 3
“Shit! Shit! Shit!” I moaned out loud as I slammed my purse into the side of the departing subway train.
I ignored the questioning stares I got from other passengers on the platform, pushing my way back through the rush hour crowd to head back up the stairs I’d just ran down. If I hadn’t gone back in to grab my half eaten lunch I wouldn’t have missed the train. The next train, going my way, wouldn’t come for another twenty minutes and it was five below outside, there was no way I could stand the cold for that long. It had already started to snow in downtown Manhattan, and Erickson would be wondering why I hadn’t picked him up before dark as usual.
I let my hands go into the pocket of my coat, jingling the two quarters Ms. Nancy had left for me with my lunch. I’d planned on using the 50 cents to buy a newspaper and scope out some jobs, but now I needed one of them to call her and let her know I was going to be late. I cursed Eric under my breath as my ballet flat covered foot sunk into the wet snow that had already completely covered the sidewalks. I’d worn the same pair of shoes everyday for the last six months; the soles were so thin that my feet were beyond soaked by the time I reached the nearest convenience store.
“Phone?” I asked as the clerk looked up at me briefly from the bullet proof window he stood behind, nodding towards the back of the store before turning his attention back towards the basketball game displayed on a tiny television mounted right beside the cash register.
“Thanks,” I mumbled with a roll of my eyes, stamping the remaining snow from my shoes as I hurried past the row of beer coolers.
Ms. Nancy had been concerned for my safety, being out in the weather, but she had no problem with me being late to pick Erickson up. She’d already given him a bath, and they were in the middle of a bedtime story when I called. My heart pulled when I heard his voice in the background, begging her to hurry and get off the phone, but I didn’t ask to speak to him. After the day I’d had, all it would have taken was the sound of his voice to send me into a fit of tears.
It wasn’t fair that he spent his days with a babysitter, sometimes not seeing me at all if I worked late like I did today. This was not the life I’d dreamed of him having, and it certainly wasn’t the life I wanted for myself. There was no light at the end of the tunnel for us; I just hoped that he would understand when he got older that I was only doing what I had to do to provide for our little family.
“Watch it!,” A female voice snapped at me as I side stepped her half stumble, half fall, through the door of the convenience store.
I immediately wanted to snap back, but let it go as she righted herself and then immediately fell into the chip display beside her.
“I got it,” I murmured, waving her away as she bent to pick up the falling bags of chips, sending the rack skidding sideways across the floor.
“No drunks!” The attendant yelled, pointing at the woman and then at the large print sign that hung on the bulletproof window.
“I’m not drunk! I have a headache!” The woman snapped back, swinging her long platinum blonde hair out of her face as she stumbled into the counter.
I gasped as she gave me a cursory glance, her hand pulling her hair back down so the side of her face was partially covered again.
From what I could tell through the black and blue bruises that dotted her cheeks and neck, she was extraordinarily beautiful. She couldn’t have been any older than I was, maybe younger, her smooth white skin flawless, except for her wounds. Her coat was halfway falling off one shoulder, and her purse was thrown crazily over the other, but this was no drunk, and she definitely wasn’t homeless. The Jimmy Choo skinny heels that graced her feet probably cost more than what I made in an entire month working in the mail room, and her jewelry screamed: REAL DIAMONDS!, even under the ugly fluorescent lighting.
“Leave!” The attendant barked as she slammed her purse on the counter, stumbling sideways as she pointed to the rack of single packaged pills behind him.
“I have money!” She slurred, given him an incredulous look as she yanked her purse from her shoulder, throwing it on the counter in front of her.
“I don’t care. No drunks!” The attendant replied, shaking his head as he turned back to the game once again.
“You stupid mother fucker! All I want is some pain medicine, and you think you can…”
Her words ended abruptly as her left leg gave under her shifting weight, sending her crashing to the floor with a thump.
“That’s it!” The attendant shouted, livid at the pile of snicker bars she’d pulled from the counter with her, now scattered all over the dirty floor.
I jumped in surprise as he pulled a bat from under the counter, slamming it down on the cracked linoleum top with a bang.
“Don’t,” I pleaded, my voice quivering as my eyes went to the blonde. “Can’t you see she’s hurt!” I cried, bending to offer my hand to the woman.
“She with you?” He growled at me now, his thick brows raising in question as he looked from me to her.
“Yes!” I blurted before thinking, catching the look of shock on her face as she slowly righted herself, her hurt leg now curled behind her.
“Well get her out of here! And don’t come back!” He added, curling his beefy fist around the bat for emphasis.
“Come on, let’s get you home,” I crooned, speaking to the woman now as if she were my son.
“My medicine…” Her voice trailed off pitifully, her hands going to the bruise on her cheek as she winced in pain.
“Aleve? Please?” I asked timidly, now searching for the purse that had fallen from the counter as well.
I fully expected him to come from behind the counter at my request, bat swinging in rage, but his face softened for the first time, his eyes now on the woman that limped towards the door.
“How many?” He asked gruffly as I sat the purse on the counter, carefully clicking the clasp open.
“Um…” I paused, my eyes widening in shock as my hands touched the only thing in the purse.
I didn’t have to open it fully to see that it was money. Lots and lots of money. There was no lipstick, no wallet, no keys, just a wad of crisp bills crammed into the bag from bottom to top; probably more money than I would see in a lifetime.
“Well?” The attendant asked as my eyes jerked back up to his face, my fingers pulling out a single hundred-dollar bill, and sliding it through the opening in the bottom of the window.
“All of it,” I whispered, the words sounding more like a question, than an answer.
“You want all of the Aleve?” He asked, his thick brows raising once again as he looked down at the bill suspiciously.
I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak as my eyes went to the woman who now leaned against the door, not paying us any mind.
“Twenty Aleve packs, at $1.99 a piece. You total is $41.87,” He said, stuffing the entire row of the little blue and white packs in a plastic bag before taking the bill from the slot.
“Keep the change… For the damages,” I mumbled, dazed as I took the bag, the purse now clutched tightly to my chest as I moved towards the door.
“Thanks,” The woman sighed gratefully as I took her elbow, holding her awkwardly as I maneuvered us both out the door and onto the sidewalk.
“Where are you headed?” I asked, checking my watch as I eyed the entrance to the subway station on the other side of the street.
“Home. I need to go home and get my pills,” She moaned in reply, reaching for the bag I held towards her.
“My train comes in eight minutes, you headed that way?” I asked, nodding toward the subway station.
“I drove,” She replied, snatching the bag from my hand as she pointed towards a Mercedes Benz that was parked illegally, half on the curb.
“Like this!? You can’t drive like this! You’ll kill yourself or somebody else!” I exclaimed, grabbing her arm to steady her as she slid in the snow, her heel catching on a patch of old ice.
“Look, I don’t know who you are, but thank you for helping me out in there. I can take care of myself,” She answered, her eyes finally meeting mine.
“Fine,” I murmured, releasing her as she pulled away from me, her hand now reaching to steady herself on the trunk of the luxury sedan.
It wasn’t my business how she’d ended up in downtown Manhattan, beaten and bruised. I had enough problems to worry about without taking hers on too. It wasn’t uncommon for the rich and famous to appear by themselves out in the city, and she obviously had enough money to buy the help she needed. I started walking without a backwards glance, my head ducked in the rapidly falling slow. My baby was waiting for me, and getting home to him was all that mattered.
***
Chapter 4
“Shit!” I screamed out loud for what seemed like the millionth time that day.
I’d just settled in my seat on the subway, my mind already absent of the woman from the convenience store, but the combination of my bag and her purse –still clutched to my chest- sent a wave of panic through me. I didn’t know how much money was in the there, but I wasn’t about to be accused of stealing it. The store undoubtedly had cameras in it, and my face was probably captured all over the tapes, retrieving the purse from the floor and then paying for items with money from it.
No one in their right mind would let that kind of money go unreported, and I couldn’t afford to have the police knocking on my door, taking me away. If I stepped off the train now, it would leave without me, but I had no choice. I’d already used my last easy pay swipe for the day and the final quarter in my pocket would not be enough to get me back on the next train that came in another twenty minutes.
Embarrassment sunk through me as I exited back onto the platform, realizing that I would have to beg the woman for two dollars just so that I could make it home. If she wasn’t still there, I would take the smallest bill from the purse and turn it in to the police station the next morning. I deserved at least that for the trouble I’d gone through to help her out.
The snow was almost blinding as I exited back onto the street from below, my eyes scanning the corner across the street for the Mercedes Benz. I’d half expected her to be long gone, but the car sat, just where she’d parked it, still on the curb. I couldn’t see if she had gotten in, but I knew she couldn’t have gone far, limping like she was. I tucked my head against the wet snow as I raced back across the street, my free hand waving in the air towards the car.
“Open up!” I called as I knocked firmly on the window, my hand now shading my eyes as I peeked through the tinted glass.
She’d fallen asleep right at the wheel!
Or she was dead! I thought suddenly as my eyes fell on her still face, her limp hand thrown across the wheel of the car.
“Lady…!” I shouted, jerking a little too roughly on the door handle, expecting it to be locked.
I was almost flung into oncoming traffic as the door sprung open easily, my feet slipping from under me as I grabbed for the top of the car.
The sudden rush of cold air must have jolted her awake, because she jumped away from my reaching hands, her expression confused as I felt her forehead on impulse. She wasn’t hot, and I couldn’t see that anything was wrong with her besides the nasty bruises. I cursed under my breath as I threw the purse over her to the passenger seat, now leaning into the car, so my body was at least out of harms way.
“You came back. Why?” She croaked, her hand immediately going to her head as she winced in pain.
“You’re purse, I still had it,” I replied, pulling on her arm in an effort to get her out of the car.
“What are you doing? I…”
“You need to go to a hospital. Something is seriously wrong with you,” I explained gently, even though I was more than ready to just walk away and let someone else find and help her.
The only problem with that is that I knew in downtown Manhattan, the chance of her freezing to death was more likely than another stranger stopping to help. I couldn’t walk away in good conscious, knowing there was a huge chance I would see her in a headline on the news the next day.
DEAD WOMAN FOUND JUST OUTSIDE OF MANHATTAN CONVEINANCE STORE!
The imaginary headline flashed through my head as I pulled harder against her dead weight, my breath now coming in sharp gasp as she resisted slightly.
“No hospitals!” She said firmly, her teeth now chattering as her eyes widened in fear.
“You need…”
“I need to go home! Please, leave me alone,” She added in a whisper, her hand now reaching for the door handle I blocked.
“If you won’t go to the hospital, at least…” I paused, the suggestion dying on my lips as I realized that I was in no position to drive her home.
I didn’t even know where she lived, and it was already almost 9:00. Ms. Nancy would be worried out of her mind if I didn’t show up soon.
“Ill drive you home, but you’ll have to pay my cab fare for me to get home,” I offered, my mind now on the money in her purse.
She could at least afford to do that if she valued her life at all.
“Why would you do that? You don’t know me?” She asked, her eyebrows lifting warily at my offer.
“Look do you want me to or not? I have a four-year-old son that’s waiting for me, and once again he probably won’t get to see his mommy before he goes to sleep. I can’t leave you here, so if I walk away, I’m at least calling the police to come take you to a hospital. Your choice,” I added, now shifting my wet feet in the brown slush that covered the ground so that my hand now rested on my hip in exasperation.
“Okay, Okay,” She mumbled, waving her hand dismissively towards me as she slid slowly from the driver seat to the passenger side. “What’s your name anyway?” She asked as I plopped down behind the wheel, shivering against the freezing wetness that now seeped through my clothes onto my chilled skin.
“Rae,” I answered, slamming the door against the falling snow, my fingers now searching blindly for a key that wasn’t there.
“Have you ever driven a Mercedes before Rae?” She mumbled so softly I had to strain to decipher the words.
“No, where’s the key?”
“There is no key,” She answered with a shake of her head, her hand now reaching towards the middle of the steering wheel.
“Nice,” I said softly as she pressed her thumb firmly on the tiny black circle, set directly in the center, the car roaring to life in an instant. “Which way?”
“Home,” She said, her voice coming even softer than before.
“I know home, but where is…”
“Home!” She interrupted me, her tone coming firm and sharp, now agitated.
I jumped as a LCD screen whooshed into sight from the center of the dash, an automated voice greeting us before displaying turn-by-turn directions to her house.
“Wow,” I sighed, jealousy gripping me for an instant as my eyes went to the corner of the purse she now sat on.
That was probably just small change to her. Never had I seen anything like this in real life, and I would probably never see it again. Things like this were only for the rich, and I was nowhere near that class of people. My heart now jumped in fear of wrecking the ridiculously expensive vehicle, my hands shaking as I finally took the wheel.
“What’s your name?” I asked nervously, pulling the car slowly onto the still busy street.
“Vana,” She yawned in reply, pressing an unseen button that laid her seat fully back. “Vana Valentino,” She sighed softly, her heard turning away from me in a drooping sleep.
“So are you going to tell me what happened to you?” I asked, my heart jumping in fear that she would snap at me again.
I glanced at her as I made the turn the GPS indicated to make, the tires skidding slightly in the wet snow as I narrowly avoided missing an oncoming car.
“Shit!” I muttered to myself as my heart began to race even faster, the snow blinding my view of where the lines on the road were.
Other cars were sliding crazily past, ignoring the fact that they were partially on my side of the road, causing me to have to almost come to a complete stop in order for them to pass without scraping me. The further I went into downtown Manhattan, the harder the snow came, swirling around us in a white frenzy that swallowed everything but the blue tinted headlights shining on the road in front of us.
“Destination 500 feet ahead on your left,” The female voice on the GPS purred, a bright white star surrounded by a green circle now blinking rapidly over what I assumed was her house on the tiny map.
“Vana?” I asked, nudging my elbow into her arm, only succeeding in knocking it off the console that lay between the bucket seats. “Vana,” I tried again, pushing the gearshift into park so that I could try and shake her awake.
Her head wobbled with my effort, but her eyes didn’t open. I would have panicked at the ghostly white pallor her skin had taken, the nasty blue and purple bruises now more pronounced than before, but I could see the tiny circle of condensation spread and contract on the passenger window her mouth almost pressed against, with each breath she took.
There were four different townhouses on my left and the only difference in them were the gold plated numbers posted just above the identical black mailboxes hanging to the right of each door.
I pressed the display screen on the GPS trying to see if there was an address below the bold letters that spelled HOME.
“Please speak password,” The female voice chirped, the image of a speaker now flashing dead center of the screen.
“Who password protects their GPS?!” I exclaimed, throwing my hands in the air as I looked over at Vana.
“Incorrect password. Please speak password,” The female voice purred again, now displaying a big red X on the screen before going back to the image of the flashing speaker.
“I didn’t say that was the password, I was talking to…”
“Incorrect password. Please speak password,” The female voice purred for the third time, interrupting me.
I wanted to scream and smack the screen off its mount, but I refrained, gritting my teeth as I said the first thing that came to mind.
“Vana Valentino?” I asked hopefully, my fingers crossing as the image of the speaker continued to blink back at me.
“Incorrect password, you are now locked out of the system. Please enter unlock code,” The female voice purred sweetly, now display a touch screen display pad of numbers.
“Fuck!” I screamed out loud smacking my hand against my thigh in irritated frustration.
I cursed myself for trying to be nice, my eyes going warily to the digital clock displayed in the dash. It was after 10:00 and Ms. Nancy had probably called the cops by now and reported me missing. I’d never been this late picking up Erickson and she was probably worried out of her mind. The only way I was going to get this chick into the right house was to get out and knock on each door. Hopefully someone would know where she lived.
I checked the street before closing the car door behind me. The direction was one way, and there was nowhere to park except right where I was, in the middle of the road. If another car happened to come, they would just have to wait until I got back to move out of the way.
***
Chapter 5
“I’m sorry to bother you. I’m looking for Vana Valentino’s house,” I said, my teeth chattering as a gust of wind hit my face, stinging my already chilled skin.
“I’m sorry…?” The older gentleman asked from behind the partially cracked door, his eyes looking past me at the still running Mercedes.
“Vana Valentino. She’s…”
“Passed out drunk again?” He interrupted me, fully opening the main door so that he could unlock the screen.
“Well not drunk, no, but I drove her home. She’s hurt, but fine…” I added quickly, hoping that he wouldn’t call the cops now.
“Two doors down –5629-, but the garage is another five blocks up. There’s no parking on this street, and I don’t know her slot number in the garage. Everyone has a access card for parking, the slot number should be on there,” He instructed, opening the screen door for me to come in.
“No, I can’t come in,” I declined, raising my hand as he motioned for me to enter.
“If she’s passed out you won’t be able to get her up those steps and in the house by yourself. Come in and let me grab my coat and shoes. I’ll help her in the house, while you go park the car,” He explained, stepping back as he looked at me expectantly.
My head screamed “No! What are you doing!?”, but I had no other choice. Never would I have walked into a stranger’s house in my neighborhood, but he was right. Vana was probably dead weight, and a lot taller and probably heavier than I was. I would be lucky if I managed to even drag her from the car onto the road, much less support her weight and mine in the deepening snow.
The older gentleman looked harmless, and I could see a stuffed animal along with a smattering of other toys in a small toy box just inside the door. He probably had grandchildren, and was just truly trying to help me. I felt guilty about leaving Vana with him while I went to park her car, but at this point I just wanted to go home to my baby. I would have to trust him.
“Ready?” He asked as he appeared again from a room towards the back of the town house, still pajama clad, but his slippers now replaced with a pair of rubber boots, and a thick wool coat now zipped up to the neck.
I nodded slowly as I followed his lead back out the front door, my frozen toes crying in protest as I stepped back down into the wet snow. There had to be some good karma coming my way for all of this. I allowed myself to hope a little that it would be in the form of some sort of payment from the stash in her purse. The idea of it sparked and then faded as I headed in the direction of the garage five blocks away.
Who was I kidding? This was New York, and no one ever gave free money away, even if you did something to deserve it.
I would be better off hoping to win the lottery, and I didn’t even play.
“Is she…okay?” I asked softly, my body now visibly shaking as the older gentleman met me at the front door of Vana’s townhouse, his tired eyes meeting mine.
“You don’t look like you know her,” He replied slowly, perusing my sopping wet shoes, and pitifully thin jacket I reserved for winter weather.
“We just met,” I admitted, my head bowing in embarrassment. “She got into some trouble at the convenience store down from my job. I tried to help her, but she was hurt. I wanted to call the police, or an ambulance, but she didn’t want me too. I promised to drive her home in exchange for cab fare, but now…” I let my voice trail off at how ridiculous this all sounded.
“Where do you live young lady?” The older man asked, his eyes never leaving my face.
“The Carver Housing projects,” I answered softly, the last word barely audible as my head hung even lower.
“You’re a long way from home…”
“I work in downtown Manhattan,” I said defensively, angry now that he was asking me so many personal questions.
It was none of his business that I was from the projects. I knew that I didn’t belong here, and I probably looked as out of place as I felt, but I’d just gone way out of my way to possibly save another person’s life.
Where was my thanks?
“I’m sorry, don’t get defensive. I was just trying to figure out the best way to get you home. I don’t think the cabs will be running until the snow slows down. You could stay with me and my wife until…”
“No!” I interrupted him, my voice a little too sharp.
I held my hand up as he looked at me in surprise, an apology already on my lips.
“Look, I’m sorry. It’s been a really long day. I’m just going to hang out here until she wakes up. She owes me money for a ride home, and I would feel more comfortable staying with her until I knew she was okay.” I explained, hoping that my honesty would satisfy the curious look he now gave me.
“All right, but I’ll send my wife by in the morning to check on both of you. The name’s Theodore. My wife is Vera Samuels. If you need anything, I’m just two doors down.”
I nodded gratefully as he moved past me, pulling his hood over his head before looking back at me once more.
I couldn’t tell if he believed my story or not, but I was sure he wasn’t going to call the cops tonight. My eyes followed him until he reached his own set of steps before closing and locking both the screen and the main door. I would check on Vana and then I had to get out of these clothes. My body was so cold I could no longer feel my fingers or my toes. I was sure a place like this probably had a dryer; I would just have to find it.
The house was completely quiet, but I could see a light coming from just down the hall. I doubted that he had carried her up the stairs that lay to my right, so I instead headed in the direction of the light, leaving my shoes in the front foyer. The rich burgundy red carpeting muffled my footsteps and warmed my feet as I walked past what appeared to be a small office, and then the living room.
“Wow,” I breathed softly to myself as I took in the spacious living area.
From the outside I would have never guessed that the town house was so big. The living room itself was almost twice the size of my own apartment, boasting a cozy little fireplace that appeared mounted in the wall just below a huge flat screen television. The lush burgundy carpeting from the hallway ran from wall to wall in here, the middle portion of it covered by an all white suede wrap around sofa and matching loveseat. On it, I could see Vana curled in a fetal position, her ridiculously high heels hanging off the side, as was her long platinum blonde hair –almost touching the floor-.
In the corner I spotted a handcrafted free standing bar, decorated with fancy bottles filled with brown and clear liquor, rows and rows of matching glasses to the right of them. Relief swept through me as I spotted a cordless phone on the edge of the bar, a red light blinking on the cradle that held it. I immediately dialed Ms. Nancy’s number as I picked it up, bracing myself for the scolding I was about to get.
“Chile, where are you!? I’ve been worried sick. You out in this weather and got your poor son crying for his momma. Don’t you ever scare me like that again! You’re like one of my own. I was about to call the police, you just don’t know…”
“I do know, and I’m sorry,” I whispered into the phone as her voice broke on the other end, her words trailing off.
I knew better than to tell her about helping a stranger out, so instead I lied. Telling her that I’d ran into my boss on the way to the subway and he’d offered me double time pay if I agreed to work for a few more hours. She knew that I was only a mail clerk, so I had to further the lie by saying that the company was in the process of securing a new client and they needed all the help they could get on the complicated paperwork involved. I knew I’d lost her when I began spitting out complicated mumbo jumbo about mergers and acquisitions that had taken place over the last month, and how important this would be to me getting a higher paying salary. I wanted to end the call as soon as possible, so I ended my explanation with a promise to be on the next subway train heading that way.
“Not in this mess out here! Are you crazy!?” She countered as soon as I’d made the promise. “Do you know how many homeless people and thugs ride the rails during weather like this just to stay out of the cold?”
“I know but…”
“There is no need to rush to pick up Erickson chile. He’s sleep anyway. What about that girl that works there with you…the one you brought to dinner that one time. What her name…?”
“Janine…?” I asked, surprised that she even remembered the one and only friend I’d made while working at the insurance company.
“Yes, her. She lives over that way doesn’t she? Can you stay with her tonight?”
“I’m sure she won’t mind,” I managed to choke out the lie as she continued on, assuring me that Erickson would be alright for the night.
I hadn’t told Ms. Nancy about what had happened with Todd, my boss, or about everyone getting laid off at the company. At the time it wasn’t her business, and even after Eric had left, I’d never found a way to come clean to her about what I’d done. For all she knew, I was still happily employed, trying to work my way up in the company for a higher paying job. This was no time to tell her that Janine and I hadn’t spoken since the day she’d been laid off, pissed at me for securing my job with a quick fuck.
There was no need for her to know about Vana, or that I would be spending the night in upper Manhattan in a strange neighborhood I’d never even heard of until about twenty minutes ago. I thanked her again for taking care of Erickson for me, and I promised to be there to pick him up as soon as I got off work the next day. There was nothing left for me to do but hang up the phone after saying goodbye for the third time, making her promise to kiss my baby for me and explain to him about mommy’s job.
Guilt sunk through me as I set the phone back in its cradle, my eyes going to the still sleeping Vana. I was cold, starving, and tired. The first thing on my to do list was to search out the dryer, and then the bathroom for a hot shower. Food would be the next thing on the list I mentally promised as I helped myself to a small glass of the first liquor bottle my hand settled on.
I was not a drinker, and it had actually been almost a year since I’d had my last drink at the office Christmas party the year before. I needed something to settle my nerves, so I made an exception, letting the warm liquid burn down my throat as I made my way from the room and further down the hallway. I lucked out on the first door I tried, finding not only a full bath, but a small laundry area tucked off to the left of the space –a full stack of towels and washcloths, waiting to be used.
***
Chapter 6
I frowned in protest at the light that now streamed across my face. I hadn’t heard the alarm go off, and the single window in my tiny apartment allowed no light in because of the thick plywood that Eric had nailed over it when we first moved in. I jumped upright as my mind raced, thinking that someone had finally fulfilled my worst nightmare of breaking in while me and Erickson Jr. slept.
“She’s awake,” a high-pitched voice called to the right of me, causing my head to jerk in that direction.
I was disoriented as I took in the vaguely familiar room, the fireplace still lit at a high blaze from the night before. The petite teenager standing halfway across the room, her mouth turned upward in a frown as she took in my dishelved appearance, was not familiar. I opened my mouth to speak and then closed it, my eyes falling on the sofa Vana had been laying on all night.
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